Metaphors and Analogies

28 Oct



Metaphors and Analogies

By L. Stewart Marsden


The air is rife with them.

For us LOTR enthusiasts, who also happen to be third party supporters, I unapologetically offer the following. The music in the background is NOT from the film, but Sting’s I’ll Be Watching You.

Frodo and Sam are Gary and Bill. Frodo is a bit bewildered, but Sam is always his stalwart (the metaphor might break down at this point).

The Eye on the mountain is the political establishment.

Gollum is mainly HRC’s camp at this point. I think the ring might be Trump — who tends to drive people insane, but not sure.

We know despite all odds, Frodo and Sam complete their quest. The jury is fairly unanimous that G&B won’t — and that it’s unlikely they will score high enough with votes to establish a bonafide third party. Especially if Gary keeps smoking maryjane (Lembas — the Waybread), it looks like he won’t reach the summit to toss Donald into the fire of the mountain.

Still, we can hope. We know Gollum will do anything for the ring (here the metaphor switches from being Donald — eeeyeww! — to Hillary becoming POTUS), and she is willing to bite off Gary’s finger, which is the one he uses to tamp his bowl of maryjane — I mean, to hold his Lembas.

In our scenario, it is likely that Frodo and Sam succumb to the mountain fire, not Gollum, who morphs into someone whose name we cannot mention. And then Harry …

But, that’s another story for another time, my children. It is the season of spooks and goblins and things that go bump in the night. I suppose we should expect no less — and certainly no more.

Without a doubt, the scariest story to come down the pike in a long, long time.

The End.


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