Overheard at an outdoor café

26 Mar

Overheard at an outdoor café

by L. Stewart Marsden

 

“So, what do you think? Should we go?”
“I’m not sure I want to spend good money on it. After all, it will eventually go to Netflix.”
“C’mon! What else would we do with the day?”
“Walk? Have that conversation you’re always begging me for?”
“I’m in a movie mood and not a talking mood today. I feel like a box of buttered popcorn and a large Coke.”
“Funny. You don’t look like buttered popcorn or coke.”
“Did you write the check and send it?”
“I’ll do it later.”
“Later! With you, everything is later! Why not sooner than later? Write the check now and we’ll walk down to the post office and take care of it.”
“Look! If you continue pushing like this, you might not care for the results.”
“Really? If I don’t push, it won’t happen! Perhaps you’re rethinking this . . . ”
“I’m not rethinking — I’m — I’m just being careful.”
“There’s a difference between careful and careless, you know. Hop on it now, or lose the opportunity.”

 

“Did you see the way she looked at me?”
“Who?”
“The waitress.”
“I guess not. How did she look at you?”
“Like an enemy. Like she was tolerating me only because of her job.”
“Well, no — I didn’t pick up on that.”
“But you! Oh, she was totally into you.”
“Was she?”
“Like you didn’t notice that.”
“Well I didn’t. Honest!”
“You’ve been here before without me.”
“Certainly not! Well, not lately.”
“What’s lately?”
“A month — maybe. Maybe more.”
“So you have been here without me!”
“I’ve been many places without you. And, I daresay, will probably go to many more places without you. What’s the big deal?”

 

“What are you going to get?”
“The eggs Benedict and a glass of orange juice.”
“They weren’t good last time. Have the cheese omelet with a side of wheat toast and half a grapefruit.”
“Are you ready to order?”
“She’ll have the cheese omelet with a side of wheat toast and half a grapefruit. Coffee black.”
“And you?”
“Eggs Benedict and a glass of orange juice.”
“Anything else?”
“No. That’s all thank you.”
“What was that?”
“That was me ordering brunch.”
“But you ordered the eggs Benedict.”
“I did. And I ordered what you wanted.”
“I didn’t want cheese omelet — I wanted you to have the cheese omelet!”
“But I wanted the eggs Benedict.”
“They weren’t good last time.”
“That was then, this is now.”
“You’re impossible! I’m leaving!”
“If you do, then I’m stuck with the cheese omelet which I will have to offer to that man over there who is eavesdropping on us.”

 

“Okay. Finish up and we can make the next show. This is three Sundays in a row we’ve gone to the movies, though.”

 

“Will you please write the check?”

 

“Okay, truth. I do know the waitress.”
“Aha! I knew it!”

 

“Sir, would you like a cheese omelet, wheat toast and half a grapefruit? It’s on me.”

 

By the way, the cheese omelet is absolutely marvelous at this café. I highly recommend it. And, if you can get it for free, so much the better.

 

Copyright © by Lawrence S. Marsden, 2014
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12 Responses to “Overheard at an outdoor café”

  1. Book Club Mom March 27, 2014 at 8:01 am #

    Very clever – I love the ordering part – having someone tell me what or what not to order is a real pet peeve!

  2. platosgroove January 13, 2015 at 9:39 pm #

    I laughed about the guy eavesdropping.

    • skipmars January 13, 2015 at 10:07 pm #

      When I was younger, my dad took my mother, my brother and me out to dinner. As we were eating, I noticed my mother smiling and nodding as though in a conversation — but we were eating, not talking. I then realized she was eavesdropping on the table next to us — more engaged with them than with us. When I called her out on it, she turned 50 shades of red (not gray).

  3. platosgroove January 14, 2015 at 12:03 am #

    Great answer!

  4. skipmars May 9, 2015 at 10:28 am #

    Reblogged this on Writing Odds n Ends and commented:

    Saturday Review . . .

  5. InfiniteZip May 10, 2015 at 5:28 am #

    Conversations at restaurants can be a hoot…especially when traveling through different states…😀

  6. frederick anderson May 11, 2015 at 3:21 am #

    Nothing to add. Fantastic dialogue – absolutely love it!

  7. Outlier Babe May 13, 2015 at 7:14 am #

    I’m with Frederick.
    🙂

    • skipmars May 19, 2015 at 5:34 pm #

      Check Liebster Award again. Was lost but now is found …

  8. Susan howard January 29, 2016 at 4:07 pm #

    Enjoyed the dialog! Made me slightly uncomfortable, like I was there!

  9. Sandi August 13, 2016 at 7:55 pm #

    I agree with everyone. That was funny and felt like I was sitting right there eavesdropping on this couple.
    50 Shades of Red…hum. Fifty Shafes of Grey not so bad either. :-))

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